Adolescence Exposes Hidden Emoji Language Every Parent Needs to Decode

Scene from Adolscence. (Netflix)

Netflix show Adolescence has highlighted some of the hidden meanings behind emojis. (Netflix)

Parents are being urged to familiarise themselves with the secret emoji language teens are using after Netflix drama, Adolescence, highlighted some of the sinister meanings behind the symbols.

The limited series centres around 13-year-old Jamie Miller (Owen Cooper), who is accused of the murder of a female classmate, Katie. The widely-discussed programme features an enlightening scene where a teenager explains to his police officer father the hidden meaning behind certain emojis.

In episode two, DI Luke Bascombe, played by Ashley Walters learns that he has been completely misinterpreting a series of emojis left by the victim Katie, on Jamie’s Instagram profile, which he assumed to be flirtatious.

It’s only when his teenage son, Adam (Amari Bacchus), breaks down the use of the emojis that he comes to realise that there’s a darker meaning behind the symbols.

Adolescence. Ashely Walters as Detective Inspector Bascombe in Adolescence. Cr. Courtesy of Netflix © 2024
Ashely Walters as Detective Inspector Bascombe in Adolescence. (Netflix)

The detective is left shocked as he learns how a red pill, derived from the movie The Matrix, “is like I see the truth” and a “call to action by the manosphere”, a term for the dark online world promoting toxic masculinity and misogyny.

Adam goes on to say the exploding red pill and kidney bean represents an incel, the term used to describe males who are involuntarily celibate, and the 100 emoji relates to the “80 to 20 rule”, a theory that 80% of women are attracted to 20% of men.

With the show sparking a national conversation about the online harms hiding in plain sight, former deputy head teacher, Amit Kalley, has created a Periodic Table of Sinister Emojis.

Kalley, who is now the founder of For Working Parents, which helps carers navigate the ups and downs of parenthood, told Yahoo UK that many parents “feel out of their depth” when it comes to understanding the alternative meanings behind the secret emojis children are using on a daily basis.

Former deputy headteacher, Amit Kalley created this graphic highlighting some of the alternative emoji meanings. (For Working Parents)

Former deputy headteacher, Amit Kalley created this graphic highlighting some of the alternative emoji meanings. (For Working Parents)
“When watching Adolescence, what I already knew was confirmed: so many parents feel out of their depth when it comes to the online world and understanding the digital language,” he explains. “The programme highlighted the important issue of how emojis might be used to have alternative and sinister meanings.”

In his work as a former deputy head, Kalley says he understood emojis were being used for topics both inside and outside the incel movement, so decided to create a graphic that highlights this easily for parents.

“I had no idea it would go viral and I have been inundated with over 500 requests for the graphic from teachers, HR leads and parents from all over the world,” he tells Yahoo UK. “It just shows how huge this topic is, how lost many parents feel and why raising awareness about the digital language is so important.”

Boy using emojis (Getty Images)

Parents are concerned about the ‘hidden’ meanings behind certain emojis their children are using. (Getty Images)
While parents may have dismissed the use of emojis as harmless fun, Adolescence has hinted that they can be masking and even normalising it some dangerous hidden ideals.

“From the parents I’ve spoken to, so many just had no idea that emojis, which many of them use in their own communication, could have such sinister meanings,” Kalley explains. “Upon realising they have alternative meanings, it has sent lots of parents into panic mode, but it’s important to remember that context matters. If parents see emojis and don’t understand the context, that is the time to have a conversation.”

Kalley says the show highlights the need for parents to be more educated on the online world. “I want to see more parents being proactive, no matter how difficult, in understanding the dangers that exist online for their children,” he explains. “It’s about considering when their children are ready for devices and ensuring that measures are in place for them to stay safe.”

For parents, his advice is simple: keep learning, keep reading, keep researching, and keep talking to your children about the online world.

“When these conversations are normalised, children know that they are being monitored and children also know that their parents are their safe space when they’re in trouble,” he adds.

Mother talking to teenage son about the online world.

Experts say it is important to involve yourself in your child’s online world. (Getty Images)

Don’t wait until there’s a crisis or issue. “Normalise regular conversations,” suggests Kalley.

Kalley suggests asking open-ended questions. “Avoid lecturing or judgemental tones,” he adds.

Reassure them they won’t be in trouble. “Let them know you’re here to listen and help,” Kalley explains.

Often parents are concerned about admitting if they are unsure about a certain topic, but Kalley says it is okay to admit ‘I don’t know’ or ‘This is difficult for me too’.

Use media, books, and current events to shape your conversations. “For example, ‘That storyline on TV made me think – what would you do in that situation?’,” Kalley suggests.

Instead of asking about what they have done, Kalley recommends asking indirect questions. For example: ‘What do your friends think about…?’, ‘What have you heard about…?’, ‘Have you ever felt like…?’

“Be ready to follow up with listening, not correcting,” he adds.

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